FAQ: Whatever Happened to the Bad Mother's Club?

“What happened to the Bad Mother’s Club?” is a question I am faced with every now and again.

It’s been, at times, difficult to answer, because in many respects it is still here and going along nicely.

Kinda.

Sort of.

Since its conception some years back, quite a few in fact, it has undergone a number of iterations. Some of which I’m embarrassed to even acknowledge. Not because I think they were stupid or wrong or dumb or anything, but because I was new to running a business, I was naive and I trusted implicitly.

(A trait, I admit, I have allowed take control at various times since then, too, but I am learning.)

I was pushed into launching it well before I was ready, by someone I trusted whom had, I soon found out, their own agenda. Ultimately, it was for their benefit. Stupidly, a few years later, I relaunched, albeit slightly differently, by someone who was even more forceful and whom also had their own agenda. You see, the name and the concept had great media and publicity potential, and there were those who, under the guise of supporting me, were in it for the attention.

Unfortunately, these – I won’t say ‘stupid ideas’, because, they were great ideas albeit a stupid time to carry them out, they were done out of business immaturity, naivety and faith – iterations cost loads in finances, friendships and clients. The stress was amazingly debilitating, I had to rely on others way more than I like to, and worse, I was unable to adequately acknowledge how much I appreciated those who truly supported me. I had far too many balls in the air and, inevitably, some dropped.

As much as I am loathe to admit it, I couldn’t do it all.

Whilst I used to consider it – or, rather, myself, a big, fat failure, and constantly reminded myself of this fact, I soon realised it wasn’t ‘all me’ and I could take responsibility of my own choices. Amazing revelation, that one!

Not only that, however, there was much more adding to my stress with it. Even when I cut it back, in terms of cost (financial and time), worked it so I didn’t have to rely on others to the degree I was, and made it completely manageable.

The main, the biggest issue was, despite my best of intentions, Australia is just not ready for this sort of thing. Australia is, although quite perplexingly, more PC than I like to think we are. I know I was stepping out there a little, but man was I holding back … and still,

6 Replies to “FAQ: Whatever Happened to the Bad Mother's Club?”

  1. Oh man, this made me a little teary (for you, for me, for mums everywhere who feel so constrained that they can’t publicly acknowledge anything less than perfection because of idiots, and for the idiots), but mostly thrilled that you continue to fight the awesome fight for mums who aren’t always up to coping with ridiculous expectations.
    Whatever we call it, this is a safe place. Love ya guts xox

  2. Great post! So true that we are all ‘Real Mums’. If it makes the judgey perfect mums feel better about themselves so they can keep faking that they are going along ‘perfectly’ being cookie cut mum then I guess it’s a good thing. Only a truly ‘bad mum’ can embrace the honesty and caring that came from that club. I haven’t been on for yonks just because well.. Life. Need to go and have a visit tho!

  3. from a ‘bad mum’ who just got the whole concept whole heartedly and never felt bad about using the term, thank you for giving us this space if we chose to access it.
    Nobody around me got it – but that’s why it was the perfect place for me 🙂

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