Happy Birthday to Me

Very early a.m. Sometime around Stupid O’Clock

Sitting up feeding Chippie in the very early hours of the morning.

Older kids asleep. Husband lying beside me, snoring (LOUDLY – argh!). Small baby attached to breast.


Happy Birthday to me. Like anyone else cares …

Later that morning

Smallest child wakes. Wants more food. Grumpy staggers up, gathers small child, tosses him towards me, collapses into bed and continues snoring.

Middle child come in, leaps onto bed, wriggles around a lot, wriggles increasingly more with each request to desist.Oldest child eventually emerges, also incapable of climbing onto bed quietly, takes a flying leap and commences wriggling.


Happy birthday to me.

Grumpy eventually remembers, tells kids to say Happy Birthday. Monkey Boy brings in card he has made for me. With my age wrong. Wrong in the right direction though. So not too bad.

They present me with a small box of chocolates … where are the slippers I need! And new runners. I specifically put in a request for new runners!

Godzilla asks if he can get my present. Yay!

Its a present a friend sent me two days ago, but wasn’t allowed to open until today.

Someone loves me – its chocolate teddy bear biscuits!!!!

So much for bloody family.

Later that day

No other presents forthcoming. But no time to dwell. Grumpy heads off to work. I take kids for photos to be taken. Drop into Grumpy’s work for lunch, where we are served by a surly 17 year old student.

Several surly 17 year olds, in fact, who are doing a week of ‘front of house hospitality’ in their school holidays to decide if they want to take this up as a career option.

I consider offering them some career advice, but decide to bite my tongue for the time being. Mostly because all three of us (no, wait, make that four!) are starving and my career advice would only be borne out of a decidedly depleted blood sugar levels and may not come across so much as advisory as fucking pissed off.

Menus arrive.

We order.

We get home.

Grumpy follows a few hours later, then its out to dinner with friends.

One who spoils me.

And, geez, doesn’t she make Grumpy look bad!

Still nothing from family.

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