I am a huge – HUGE – believer in parents and teachers working together in “raising” children.
For the most part, I don’t believe there need be an “it’s the teachers job to teach them that” nor “it’s the parents’. Obviously, curriculumy type stuff like reading and spelling and maths and stuff, then teachers are trained to do just that. Also, they know what they’re doing, because they have learnt it under the appropriate conditions. Non-teachers haven’t.
(I know I personally sucked, big time, at geography and history, and probably maths was a bit sucky, too, so no point getting me terribly involved in actually teaching the stuff. But supporting teachers in teaching it, I’m there!)
In cases like “manners” and “empathy” and stuff like that, for me, it goes without saying that it is just a part of the day and whoever happens to be there at the time deals with it; if it happens in the playground, then there is the opporunity to enforce what needs to be enforced. Ditto at home. It’s not, in my opinion, someones “job” to do it, nor should it be a Teachers versus Parents thing.
That’s just stupid.
Which is why I’m feeling particuarly angry and frustrated and just damned annoyed and angry (did I say angry?? Well I’m seriously pissed off!) after the Getting To Know Your Kid Parent Teacher Interview I had yesterday with my 10 year old’s teacher.
After having dealt with a really lovely, and really passionate, but just out of teaching school and very textbook teacher last year, I learnt a lot. Mostly, how my son functions. He’s a really bright kid. He’s also a really sensitive and compassionate kid, who thrives on positive feedback, yet struggles to accept it, and takes any negative to heart. Really to heart.
He’s not an angel. He is a 10 year old boy.
After the interview I was sad. Felt like I’d failed. Not listened to, patronised and, hard for me to take, was spoken to defensively. Everything I said or asked, the reponse was a defence. I lost count of the number of times I said “I’m not arguing with you, I’m on your side” and “Yes, I’m just trying to let you see how he interprets that” and “so how can we work together to get him doing that?” Funny, I’ve only ever heard of teachers asking that of parents.
I know he likes to divert and dominate conversation to avoid doing something. I also know that he does this because he is disgustingly scared of failure. I also bring the diversion to his attention. I have learnt. I thought, stupid me, that sharing this with his new teacher would give her some insight.
I thought this is what the interview was about.
I had a chat to Monkey Boy last night. I approached his teacher this morning so I could get an understanding of exactly