Motherhood: It changes you and changes nothing about you

One thing the school holidays teach me – and something I am perpetually reminded of – is who I am.

I read in some book, somewhere along the line, the comment that “motherhood profoundly changes who you are”.

I agreed.

I disagree.

In the first instance, becoming a mother gives you things you couldn’t even imagine. I used to nod and agree and pretend I understood when new parents would say to my childless self “you don’t know love until you’ve had kids”. Oh, I got them! I didn’t disagree, I didn’t try to convince them I understood; but I got it.

Until that love hit me in the chest and knocked me for six.

I mean, I

4 Replies to “Motherhood: It changes you and changes nothing about you”

  1. I totally agree. On both counts. Yes, we are fundamentally changed by motherhood as far as our ability to love goes, but we really do remain the same in our natures, passions and longings. The most profound example of this I can share was when I first went back to work after a 9 year break. I LOVE my work in the film industry and missed it intensely while i was looking after my young lot. Halfway through my first day back in the thick of it I was asked “do you miss your baby?”
    What baby?

    1. OMG I love it!

      I have so been there, hearing ya!

      Sadly, I think it is a whole discussion that, for whatever reason, people are just too scared to talk about – you know, mothers having minds of their own or something.

      Glad you enjoyed your day back at work though x

      1. Thanks. Yes, a good friend of mine just about disappeared when she had her two boys. She has spent the past 12 years denying that she existed in any form except as a mother. Thankfully she’s finally uncovering herself again. I often wonder how it happens to so many women.

        1. I think it happens due to intense social expectations; including the books and the way the media portray certain motherhood traits and behaviours.

          The, of course, how they are picked up by others … vicious cycle.

          I know I succumbed to PND that was triggered by social expectations.. ironically, I also found myself in the process. Liberating 😀

          (Which is why I ramble on about it so much now LOL)

          Edited to fix typos 🙂

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