Hubby off to work at some stupid hour.
That is, before 10.00am. In this case, before 6.00am – so really stupid.
Followed, not long after, being treated to a good 37 minutes of “WAAAH I wan’ DADDY!” from the room across the hall, from the hall, from one side of the bed just before it was climbed into and it was discovered it was Mummy and not Daddy lying there, from the floor beside the bed after he’d flopped down on it, from the end of the bed, accompanied by some percussion in the form of feet kicking the bed end, from my side of the bed, which had been climbed into and it being discovered it was still Mummy and not Daddy lying in the foetal position with the doona pulled up over her head sobbing hysterically …
… and more of the same …
… till he climbed in and put his ice-block-like feet on my tummy.
At this point I attempted to crawl out of bed, praying and hoping and wishing the crying would not start up again. Its hit and miss and there is no tangible trigger or sign that it may kick off again. You never can tell. But you’re often tiptoeing around.
Tiptoeing actually has no effect whatsoever on the screaming, but its just one of those things you do. Like whisper in dark rooms. For no reason.
That done, we got through the toast making ceremony and toast eating ceremony and the encore, demanding more toast. Godzilla had been up for a while and it was time to do the late morning “GET UP NOW!” to Monkey Boy.
Godzilla located one of those stupid annoying whistles that Other Mothers give out at birthday parties. He wasn’t actually invited to it, but got a whistle anyway. Coupled with a complete inconsideration for others at any time of day, especialy mornings when others have just woken up and/or haven’t yet had their coffee, he began dancing around the house and blowing it.
I think my eye actually started pulsing in my head.
He blew it when I walked past.
I’m not one for making rash threats, unless I’m threatening then with a rash to prevent them going somewhere because they’ve been misbehaving, and have learnt from previous experience about promising things I’m not going to carry through with. By with I mean promising they will absolutely not be going for a sleepover this weekend if the behaviour continues. Etc.
I blame the sheer effort it took to prevent myself