Parenting Teenagers Is Hard

Teenagers, hey? Who’d have ’em?

They are, so I’ve heard, the real reason some animals eat their young.

There is, of course, a lot of merit to not eating teenagers themselves. Aside from the fact that their smell isn’t terribly appealing, they also have more hair sprouting from all over their bodies, and ooze an oil like substance that, when viewed in the mastication and consumption context, reminds one of fast food that leaves a greasy stain on anything and everything it touches and is, yet again, not terribly appealing from an eating perspective.

It’s like they’ve absorbed all the fat from the flipping burgers job they’ve taken up part time, and their awkward bodies can’t cope with it, so excretes it through their facial pores.

No, babies would

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