I was a pretty top notch basketball referee when I was younger. The youngest ever, at the time, to have been invited to do my A-grade referee level.

I was also a pretty good aerobics instructor. I ran a business as a personal trainer for ten years, on my own.

After that, whilst raising a young’un or two, I completed a university degree. Majoring in family, society and health. Graduating with a high distinction average. High. Distinction. Average.

I”m reguarly called upon by the media to offer quotes and comment about parenting.

I’m a paid speaker.

I’m a paid writer.

I’m even a published author.

I is somewhat clever.

And how did I spend my afternoon, you may well ask?

Counting. Lego.

Counting Fucking. Lego.

All I can say is “Thank fuck this motherhood gig is not a job, because I’d be going postal about now!”

(And if it is a “job” then it’s not the “best” I’ve ever done. It’s one of the suckiest at times. Still, not the worst though …)

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