Things to learn at school

I’d been left alone with Chippie for the morning, but after completely losing the plot last night and embarking on a crying, sobbing, verbally-vomiting rant about Life As We Know It Right Now, Grumpy Pants offered to perform the LEGO Club and School Parent Helper in Monkey Boy’s grade 5-6 class this afternoon.

With my To Do List rapidly expanding at the same rate in which my Available Time is declining, and what with the diaphragm incident of last week, I was more than happy to oblige. I don’t think I even bothered with the “are you sure?” and just locked myself in my office and turned Aerosmith up very loud.

Warning me he may be home immediately after LEGO Club, I requested he advise the teacher I would not be coming. He wasn’t home by 3.45p.m. so figured he’d replaced me for the afternoon. Whatever.

When they did arrive home, Chippie was in fine form, running around the house, crazy. He barrelled towards Monkey Boy and, nose-to-nose, yelled “GO TO HELL you naughty brat!”

Monkey Boy tried to get me to intervene, but, sadly, Chippie probably had good grounds and was just being honest. Chippie proceeded to race around yelling “go to hell!” to anyone. And mostly to no one.

Warn out from that, he commenced slamming his trains into things and yelling “Shit!” when they fell off the couch.

I’m not sure I want to know what happened at school today … *sigh*

All I know is that he doesn’t come home like that when he comes with me.

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