First thing in the a. m.
“Mum? What’s three plus three?” Godzilla asks me.
“Um. What? Why? Have you eaten your breakfast yet? Go and have breakfast? And stop asking me that question. It’s really annoying.”
Later that day …
Walking home … “Mum? What’s six plus six?”
I have brain capacity to think about it, and to answer the question much better than I could earlier this morning: “You tell me.”
“Um, twelve. What’s ten times ten?”
*sigh* “You tell me,” and wishing bus weould detour over me so I don’t die of being annoyed first.
“Ummmmmm. One hundred!”
Really not sure why I must be forced to go through this trauma when he has the answers, I know he has the answers, he knows he has the answers before he asks, and I’m fairly sure he knows I know he has the answers. Or something.
“Mum? What does minus mean?”
Clearly, not enough coffee was partaken in as I went the I’ll Be Clever And He Will Shut Up route.
“Take away, subtract, remove.”
“You mean like take something away from a number,” Godzilla asks.
“Yeah,” I add before getting even cleverer. Er. “Basically, if something is removed from something else, or if something is missing something then you can use the word minus” and much much more using big words and lots of rambling in the hope he will get bored and we can go back to him climbing fences, his younger brother screaming and me dreaming of a life involving someone bringing me tropical cocktails whilst I lie on a beach.
“So, something is taken away?”
Clearly, more work is needed. “Yeah. So, for example,” I think quick on my feet with my severely sleep and caffeine deprived brain as a car turns the corner in front of me, “Say that car there is ‘minus its wheels’, what does that mean?”
“Ummmmm. It’s a hovercar!!!!!!!”
Of course it is …
(I was very tempted to ask “and what is mummy minus her wine?” but am not quite prepared for the answer to that question. Especially as I have no wine. Yet.)